The Movie Writes Real Life
by TheSnarkKnight
Summary: Lindsey Thompson's friends are being killed off by someone imitating the movie Scream. Who's the murderer? Will Lindsey make it to the sequel? I don't usually write these stories, but it popped into my head. Gory, snarky, and pop culture savvy.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, I don't know if anyone is going to read this, or if I'm writing this for myself, but this popped into me head one night. It takes place in our world where the Scream movies are very much real and Ghostface is a well know horror figure. It's got the basic structure of a Scream movie, as the killers are trying to make it seem like one of the movies. This is just for fun, I don't even know why I'm putting it up on here. I don't even normally read these stories myself. Should be super meta. Much swearing, violence, the works. **

**I do not own anything I reference in this story but all these characters are mine and hopefully so is the story.  
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Dana closed the window in her living room and wrapped her arms around her shoulders. It was the middle of May and the weather was just starting to warm up. She turned on the tv, flipping to the channel with movie rentals. Her best friend Carly was sleeping over, and they were home alone until her parents decided to return from the bar. She heard a noise from the window behind her and jumped when her cat climbed out of the curtains. She couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching her, and couldn't stand being alone for much longer. She heard a knock on the door and carefully went to answer it. There stood Carly with an angry look on her face.

"Jeez, just because the weather's warm everyone and their mother is outside tonight. You know that freak Mace we used to go to school with?" Carly asked. Dana nodded in response.

"He just tried to sell me some kind of drug! It was so disgusting," Carly took a seat on the couch and dropped her bags nearby. Dana grabbed the popcorn and remote, then sat next to her.

"So what are you in the mood to watch tonight?" Dana asked, "Comedy, teen, horror..."

"If I wanted to watch a horror movie, I would've gone to Lindsey's house. I'm not a huge fan," Carly said.

"So how about a teen movie?" Dana said.

"You already made me watch Can't Buy Me Love. I mean, seriously, they ride off on a lawn mower after he treated her like crap for half a movie. That's not sweet, it's stupid," Carly complained.

"Fine, we'll watch a comedy then. So romantic, ridiculous, or parody?" Dana said.

"Let's piss off Linds and watch Scary Movie," Carly said.

"She would get pretty pissed. She thinks their tasteless, or some shit like that..." Dana trailed off when she heard the phone ring. The Caller ID listed it as a private number, which could be her aunt at work. Or a psychotic killer. With hesitation she went to pick it up.

"Hello," She said.

"Hello Dana," A deep voice said. She nearly dropped the phone.

"Who is it?" Carly asked, noticing the shock on her face.

"I don't know," Dana said. She needed to hang up and call the police but before she could Carly grabbed the phone from her and put it on speaker.

"Hey, who the hell is calling?" Carly yelled into the phone.

"Don't you recognize me Carly? Haven't you seen this movie before?" The voice said.

"Yeah, this is the voice from that shitty movie Scream. Lindsey, if this is you trying to be funny I'm gonna flip. Dana's actually scared right now," Carly replied with annoyance.

"This isn't Lindsey, but this is the last person you're ever going to see alive," The voice said.

"Wow, that's really shitty. You aren't Lindsey, she'd be much more creative," Carly mocked.

"I'll show you how creative I can be when I fucking kill you," The voice shouted. Dana looked around frantically.

"Carly, give me your phone so I can call the fucking police, this isn't funny," She said.

"This is just a prank, I don't believe any second of it," Carly said to Dana, then turned to the phone, "I don't believe that you even know where we are right now."

"You're standing in Dana's living room, getting ready to watch Scary Movie," The voice said. Dana let out a sob, "Poor choice, by the way. Parodies are really... disrespectful to the art."

"Carly, give me your fucking phone now! I'm calling the police," Dana said.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," The Voice said, "Not unless you only want to miss your only chance to live."

"What the fuck do you want from us?" Carly asked.

"I want to play a game. Now I know you're not big horror fans so I'll keep it simple. Answer a question wrong, you die. Answer it right and you move up a round. Answer all ten of the questions right and you get to live. Understand?"

Carly grabbed Dana's hand and squeezed it.

"Just try to think of the shit our friends talk about okay Dana?" She said. Dana nodded. "We're ready. First question."

"Good. Since you claim you've seen the original, name one killer from the Scream saga," The voice said. Carly thought for a second and responded with one she remembered hearing Lindsey talk about.

"Billy Loomis," She said through gritted teeth.

"Good job, you get to keep your heartbeat for round two. What is the name of the killer in The Ring?"

Carly felt her heart drop. She'd never cared to find out what that movie was about, let alone who the killer was. She looked at Dana in desperation. Surprisingly Dana took the phone from her.

"Her name was Samara," Dana said, still shaking with fear.

"Round three, what is the most recent horror movie remake?"

Dana and Carly looked at each other in supposed agreement. Dana handed Carly the phone to answer.

"It was A Nightmare on Elm Street," She said.

"No no no no no, it was Pirahna," Dana shouted in an attempt to correct her mistake.

"I'm sorry, too late. Wrong answer, you lose. Now get ready for the real game," The phone clicked and the dial tone beeped. There was absolute silence.

"I'm sorry Dana, I'm so sorry," Carly cried out. Tears started streaking down her face.

"Call the police. I'm pretty sure the doors are locked. If we don't leave, he can't get us," Dana said, her voice trembling.

"Maybe it was all a prank," Carly said, while dialing 911. Just after she said it there was a crash from the second floor.

"Shit, I didn't close the window. Carly, go out the front door," She screamed.

A figure in black was running towards her. She leaped off the back of the couch, heading to the kitchen. If she could make it out the back door maybe she could run to safety. Once she was in the kitchen she realized that no one was chasing her. She heard a scream from the living room and all she could think about was Carly. She raced back with the intention of doing something to help her, but she was met with a gruesome sight.

Carly was on the floor with multiple wounds, bleeding on the carpet. Her eyes were open but lifeless. Dana ran over and touched her lifeless body frantically. She couldn't believe this was happening. She needed to get out but she couldn't move, couldn't leave the mangled corpse of her best friend. When the murderer with the ghostlike mask came at her with a knife, all she could do, was scream.

**If you read it and you hate, or if you read it and you love it, review please.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Here's where we meet our main character. And she meets Ghostface.**

Lindsey sat on the reclining chair next to Mark and sighed loudly. He paused his video game and turned to her.

"What is it?" he asked. She roller her big brown eyes at him.

"When I asked you to keep me company while my parents were gone, I didn't think you'd take that as an invitation to rape my flatscreen with Call of Duty," She said. Her parents and siblings had gone on a cruise for a week and left her home alone because of her fear of boats. She'd asked her friend Mark to keep her company and he'd arrived yesterday, a few hours after they'd left. Lindsey was usually incredibly okay with staying home alone when she had to , but being lonely for a week didn't seem like much fun. So Mark convinced his parents that she needed his support, and here they were.

"It's not rape if the flatscreen likes it and oh baby, is it having a good time," He laughed. She grabbed a nearby pillow and tossed it at him.

"So dearest, have you decided whether you're gonna ask out Bree yet? I mean, I know you're gay, but she's a decent cover up and she really likes you..." Lindsey joked. Mark threw the pillow back at her.

"Very funny. I might. Possibly. I don't know," He said.

"Ooh, yay. Let's talk about our feelings and then we can watch Titanic and bawl our eyes out," She squealed. He laughed.

"As long as you tell me whether Jonah will ever have his chance with you," He exclaimed.

"Oh, he-"Her response was cut off by her cell phone ringing. She picked it odd the coffee table.

"It's Carly," She announced, then answered. "Hello?"

"Hello Lindsey," The voice of Ghostface said.

"Carly that's awesome, is there really an app you can get for your phone? Fuck, sometimes I wish I had your phone," She said. Mark made a face.

"Carly and Dana are dead and I killed them. Don't believe me, come and see for yourself," Ghostface said, then hung up. Lindsey jumped out of her seat. Carly would never say something like that, she was too gentle. And she hated Scream.

"That wasn't Carly," She said, "We need to go to Dana's house. Now."

Mark listened to her, and soon they were on their way there. Lindsey described the situation and, even though he was sceptical, she had a bad feeling. When they got there they found the door left wide open, something Dana would never do. Lindsey grabbed Marks hand when he got scared and led him inside. There inside the living room were the bloody corpses of their friends, propped up and watching Scream. Lindsey bent over, feeling sick and anguished. Mark fell to the ground and let out sputtering noises. They both jumped when Lindsey's phone buzzed. It said Carly was calling her.

"Why?" She managed to say into the phone.

"It's for you Lindsey. It's the opening kill, the kickstart needed to start the events that lead to your death. I'm going to kill you. All in good time..."

**Please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Some character introductions. **

Lindsey locked her living room door and dried her eyes. It had been hours since she'd found two of her best friends dead. After the call from Ghostface, she'd called 911 right away. Her and Mark had been taken to the police station and questioned. Mark's parents had come and taken him home, leaving her alone. One of the deputies was going to call her parents but she pleaded with him not to. She was legally aloud to be home alone and she refused to interrupt her mother's dream vacation. She could cope on her own.

Her house was dark and quiet and while Lindsey rarely found anything scary, she couldn't help but be creeped out. Her throat was dry and her eyes were stained from tears. She didn't think she'd ever be able to unsee the horrors of that night. She went into the kitchen to get a drink of water and stopped dead in her tracks when her phone vibrated.

The police had found Carly's phone smashed to bits, about a block from Dana's house, but the killer would most likely just use another phone. They told her that if she got any calls from the killer again she should call the police station and let them trace the calls. She got the courage to pull out her phone and check who it was. She relaxed a little when she saw that it was just her ex-boyfriend Mitch.

"What," She answered impatiently.

"I heard about what happened tonight, are you okay?" His voice sounded frantic and caring. She hated it.

"How did you hear about it?" She asked. It had only been a couple hours and it was too late for it to be on the news.

"Daniel Glen lives down the street from Dana and he hasn't shut up about it on Facebook," He responded.

"That's incredibly insensitive," Lindsey muttered. Her and Dana used to be friends with Daniel until they went to different schools. Sure they hadn't talked in a couple years, but that didn't give him the right to be so heartless.

"Really Linds, are you okay? Is Mark still with you?" Mitch prodded. Lindsey was touched by his concern, but she didn't feel like talking to him at the moment.

"I'm fine. Mark went home, but I'm fine," She repeated it so he would understand, "Look, I need to sleep. If you're still worried, call me tomorrow."

"Okay," He said and hung up. She felt bad for being slightly rude to him, but right now wasn't the best time for a chat. She curled up on the couch, without changing or turning off any lights. She fell asleep, plagued by dreams of a killer.

Monday at school, everyone stared at her. From class to class she couldn't ignore the whispering behind her back. Third hour was the worst because that was the class she usually saw Dana in. By lunch, Lindsey just couldn't wait for the day to be over.

She grabbed her bag lunch from her locker and headed towards the cafeteria. On her way there she saw her best friend Bree. They ran into each others arms, ignoring the muttering and angry glances from other cafeteria goers.

"I can't believe this," Bree said. Lindsey nodded in agreement. They headed towards their lunch table where Mitch and Mark were sitting awkwardly. Neither of them got along with each other, especially not since Lindsey and Mitch broke up. Bree rolled her eyes and sat next to Mark.

"Mark how are you doing?" She asked. He shrugged.

"That good, huh?" Mitch said. I glared at him. Just as I was about to tell him off, Sara and Jonah sat down with their lunch trays.

"Okay, what the hell?" Sara said, "I'm sorry if this is the wrong time, but we really need to talk about this. Who's running around imitating Scream? And why on earth are they going after our friends?"

"Gee, you're right Sara, this is the wrong time," Bree said.

"She has a point. I mean, Scream is the worst horror movie to copy. It's meta crap," Jonah said.

"Oh, you've gotta be shitting me. Isn't it obvious? The killers in the Scream movies are always human. Good luck trying to be Freddy or Michael," Mitch said.

"Jonah, insult Scream again and I will cut you. We've had this discussion before and you can't come up with a legitimate reason the movies aren't good," Lindsey said. There were sighs and eye rolls from around the table.

"It ruined horror! All the self aware bullshit prevented horror movies from taking themselves seriously " Jonah exclaimed.

"Horror wasn't being taken seriously anymore. It was time for a change," She scowled. He shook his head.

"Oh god, what kind of horror fan are you anyways? Torture porn? Japanese horror? Have you seen every "haunting" movie there is? Would you go to a midnight opening of "The Paranormal Witch Haunting Ghosty"? How many remakes have you paid ten bucks to see? Do you even have the balls to enjoy a real slasher?" Lindsey said.

"I'm an 80's slasher fan. Ya know, back when they were good," Jonah shouted back.

"Slap slap kiss," Sara sang. Lindsey shot her a look of annoyance.

"Look, I really don't know what this has to do with the murders," Mark said.

"If the murderer is trying to copy Scream, then maybe the rules change," Jonah explained. Lindsey snapped her fingers and looked at everyone expectantly.

"We all know the rules to surviving a horror movie, right?" Lindsey asked. Everyone but Jonah shook their heads. "Oh how am I friends with any of you? Well pretty much, don't have sex, drink, do drugs, or say 'I'll be right back'."

"But in modern day the rules have bended, haven't they?" Sara asked. Jonah shook his head.

"Not if this is a traditional slasher. If it is, it will always follow those rules," He said.

"But that's the thing... Does it follow the traditional slasher rules? This is like The Twilight Zone," Lindsey said.

"We'll just have to hope it does," Jonah said.

**Please review.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks so much for the reviews. Constructive criticism is helpful, plus I really want to to know if I'm scaring anyone.**

"Can I go to the stage to get my notebook? I left it there last hour," Sara asked her seventh period teacher. Her teacher signed a pass and waved her off. She was almost out the door when the teacher called her name.

"What?" She groaned. A few of her classmates snickered.

"If you decide not to come back again, I'd recommend you take all of your belongings with you," The teacher said. Sara scowled.

"I'll be right back," She said, and then muttered under her breath, "Nasty old bastard."

She walked down the deserted hallways, her heels clicking. The school was white like a hospital and especially dull that day. She ignored the eeriness and opened the door to backstage. Only the blue safety lights were on, so she had to be careful searching for her notebook. While she was looking the lights flicked off and she was in complete darkness for a second.

"What the fuck?" She said to herself. When they came back on she made a break for the door, more scared than she was used to being. Just as she was almost there the lights went out again and the door shut. Thrust into utter darkness, she let out a cry.

She stood still for a second, just listening to her surroundings. Her body was trembling in terror.

"Hello?" She called into the darkness. She tried to tell herself it was just a glitch, that maybe the stage crew had screwed something up again. But considering that two of her friends were murdered that weekend, her paranoia had more fuel to supply its take over.

There was a noise from the direction of the door and she instinctively stepped away from it. More noises came and she realized they were footsteps.

"Who's there?" She shouted. In response the footsteps became faster. She stepped backwards faster, trying to get away. She couldn't see anything so she turned around and tried to feel where she was going. Her entire body felt static and adreniline pumped through her. Suddenly she tripped over something on the ground and fell on her face. She started to get up but fell back into the curtains.

The footsteps were so close now, she could feel the presence of the person next to her. Sara started to stand again, but the person reached out and grabbed her. The sleeves of the persons shirt brushed her face when they grabbed her hair. Her attacker covered her mouth with a gloved hand to muffle her scream. The world around her seemed to freeze. She knew something had happened to her but she couldn't feel anything, not even the hand pulling her hair. But then she was dropped and she could feel the ground.

Once she felt the ground, she could feel a throbbing in her back. The throbbing turned to pain, a pain she could've never imagined. Her instincts kicked in and she realized she needed to get away. She couldn't even try to stand, so she grabbed the nearby curtain and started to drag herself across the ground. She pull herself across the dirty floor as quickly as she could but the footsteps were close behind her.

Her entire body was shaking and sounds seemed like they were coming from a distance. She thought she was sobbing, but everything was so muddled. There was a tugging sensation on her head and she lost the will to fight. The last feeling she had was a knife sliding into her two more times, and then there was nothing.


	5. Excerpt

**I'm extremely sorry, but I've been busy and I just recently got my computer back. I don't have any new chapters completely revised yet**,** but I do have an excerpt from a chapter near the end of this story that I figured I'd put up. This may help you narrow down your list of suspects. If you have a good guess as to who the killer(s) is(are), feel free to share. **

"You don't get it, do you? You're not going to live through this. Because Jonah was right, you seem like the perfect final girl, at least judging by first impressions. But part of being a final girl is mixing instinct with brain power. Now you're pretty smart, but you're completely controlled by instinct. I've known you for long enough to know that when it comes down to it, you're not suited for this role."


	6. Chapter 6

**This was finished earlier than I thought it would be, so enjoy...**

"Hey, where's Sara?" Jonah asked. He shoved Lindsey's foot with his and she blushed slightly.

"I don't know, she was in sixth hour," Bree said.

"Maybe she broke a rule," Jonah suggested. Lindsey's heart sunk a little.

"Don't say that," She said and turned away from her friends.

"You know I'm just kidding," Jonah said, spinning her around to face them again.

"Yeah, Sara's probably just skipping class with her criminal boyfriend again," Bree suggested.

"I don't even want to know what they're doing," Jonah said.

"Breaking rules," Bree laughed. After a minute of silence while they actually worked on the assignment given by the teacher, Lindsey decided to voice what had been bothering her.

"That person, the person who called me from Carly's phone, said that it was all for me. That everything that happened was leading to my death," She said. The playfulness they'd had, disappeared. Jonah and Bree looked concerned but Lindsey continued before they could say anything.

"I've always made a point of not making enemies. I didn't think anyone hated me... My parents aren't anyone special. I don't understand, why me?"

"Maybe this person really is trying to go for the slasher structure," Jonah said. Bree looked puzzled.

"Well if you think about it we're the perfect group of friends for it and Lindsey is the perfect final girl. She's virginal, smart, dresses modestly, and her name could belong to either gender," He explained. Lindsey glared at him.

"Well nice to know my personality is the reason my friends are being killed. And how do you know I'm a virgin?" She asked

"Common knowledge," He stated simply.

"Wait, what am I then?" Bree asked, ignoring the exchange.

"Oh you're the blond with bit jugs. Dead girl walking," He wiggled his eyebrows. Lindsey snorted.

"Well you're the jerkass everyone wants to die. You're just as doomed as she is," She said.

"Well played Thompson," He said.

"What about the others?" Bree prodded with curiosity written on her face. Lindsey and Jonah shared a look.

"Well Sara's the partier. She drinks, smokes weed, has sex. Does all the things you're not supposed to do in a horror movie situation," Lindsey said with concern.

"Yeah and Mitch's the creepy ex. He has suspect written in big letters across his forehead," Jonah explained. Bree's eyebrows creased.

"Suspect?" She asked. Jonah sighed.

"If the killer is trying to follow the pattern of Scream, they should be someone close to me. That way the big reveal is a definite surprise," Lindsey said.

"You killed my father," Jonah shouted. Some heads in the room turned in surprise.

"Shut up, I am your father," Lindsey said, "But there aren't any real suspects yet. It doesn't seem like any red herrings have been established. In fact, me and Mark have solidly proved our innocence."

"Hey, neither of you is free of suspicion. You could've committed the murders then covered it up and called the cops. Plus, there may be, and most likely is, two killers," Jonah pointed out.

"We need to tell everyone else this, so they're prepared," Bree said. Lindsey nodded, but Jonah looked annoyed.

"But then everyone will start distrusting each other and we need to stick together," Jonah said.

"That is true. If we split up we're easier to pick off," Lindsey agreed.

"Well I'm at least telling Mark," She said, "And Mitch, and Sara, and Candace..."

"Candace doesn't have to deal with any of this Bree, her mom's keeping her at home until the murderer is found" Lindsey said.

"But she would sure add to the body count nicely," Jonah sighed

"Do you have any feelings?" Bree exclaimed, "I mean, really."

Lindsey laughed and tried to join in the following conversation about how Jonah kills puppies for fun, but was distracted by a something black whipping past the classroom door. She glanced at the teacher before getting up to go investigate.

"Whoa there Linds, where are you going?" Bree asked, grabbing her arm. Lindsey shook her off, shushed her, and walked out of the classroom. Once she'd made it out successfully, she headed the same way the figure went. She knew it was over-the-top stupid of her to investigate, but something in the back of her head was nagging her on. There were a few students in the hallways, but Ghostface didn't seem to be taking a stroll among them.

Deciding not to waste the trip, she headed to the bathroom. Washing her hands off, she looked in the mirror. A movement from under one the stalls caught her eye. Lindsey turned around to investigate, and the door burst open. She instinctively fled to the door, but was pulled back by Ghostface. Her back slammed against the cold floor and she thrashed around a bit. Ghostface pushed her down, but she freed her hand and went straight to take his mask off.

Ghostface got off of her and fled the bathroom quickly. Lindsey laid on the floor for a few seconds trying to slow her heartbeat. She got up carefully, making sure nothing was seriously injured. The only part of her in pain was her arm, and that was only a little sore. She looked cautiously around the bathroom before fleeing it and heading straight to the main office.

**I swear mentioning Candace was not last minute**, **I've had her in my outline of this story from the beginning. Also, if anyone can tell me what Lindsey's last name is referencing, you will get a DM full of compliments. It's not very complicated.**


	7. Where this story went

**Um, hey anyone who was reading this. I feel bad for not doing this before, but a while ago I moved this story to Wattpad where it has been gaining new chapters and is near an end. I've changed some things in the story there too, such as Bree's name is now Jessica, Candace's name is Nicky, and Eric and Lindsey never dated. I've tried to edit it more and more, especially now that I have spell check and I'm happy to say it's been doing pretty good as a horror/humor story. If you'd like to finish it, go look up the title on Wattad or just go ****look up thesnarkknight. OH YEAH, there's a link on my profile page here to my profile page there if using that floats your boat.**

**I really hope you'll check it out, and maybe some of my other original stories. It's been a pleasure writing it and I plan on finishing my other Scream story "She Will Be Loved And Hated" soon. Plus I've gotten a request for a Sidney/Mickey story so I might try that out. Thanks for making it this far guys, and thanks for the reviews. **

**Oh, and I'll gut you like a fish.**

** The Snark Knight**


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